#92 ⇧ (+13/-0) ⇩
< Cctoide> 'Need Another Seven Astronauts (after the 1986 crash of the Challenger Space Shuttle)'
< f8> wonder if anyone apllied
< f8> 'so, what happened to the last guy?'
< f8> 'he exploded'
< f8> !!!!
< f8> 'but you said 5 weeks of vacation?'
< f8> ...
#91 ⇧ (+25/-6) ⇩
< Hero> GYAH
-!- Hero is now known as Takuya
< Takuya> Every. Time. Someone. Said. GUITAR HERO
< Takuya> O-o;
<%relsqui> oh that sucks
< Takuya> I was like
<%relsqui> but is hilarious
< Takuya> Why is my name being higlighted..
< Takuya> like 30 times in a second
#90 ⇧ (+4/-3) ⇩
<Geese> I'd also like to nominate leadgolem for breaking my text alignment due to having an implausibly long nickname
* LE2007dGOLEM|83 is now known as LE4dGOLEM|83
<LE4dGOLEM|83> less horrific?
<yy2bggggs> Sure LE4dblabla
<Geese> Well actually it's a throback from when you were horribly merged with the channukah zombie
<Geese> My client likes to live in the past
<blorpy> i'm suing your client
<LE4dGOLEM|83> Like a time machine, but suckier?
<yy2bggggs> You can't just move the alignment line back to the left?
<Geese> Holy crap you can as well
<Geese> Undiscovered user interface bonus!
<yy2bggggs> Are you using xchat perchance?
<Geese> I am
<blorpy> i am not
<yy2bggggs> Kudos for not using mirc
<LE4dGOLEM|83> Geese: you mean to say I COULD HAVE KEPT the inclusive 2007 celebration in my name?
<Geese> Let me check
<blorpy> Geese thought he could use xchat to keep in touch with his ex
<yy2bggggs> I miss my ex a lot...
<yy2bggggs> But my aim is getting better
<Geese> Golem yes it was just the christmaskazoo that made things go wrong
<Geese> and actually I saw my ex only recently
#88 ⇧ (+3/-3) ⇩
<Geese> I can't help it :(
<LE2007dGOLEM|83> You should have stopped BEFORE you affixed the superglue to the goose
<LE2007dGOLEM|83> and then the superglue endowed-goose to your face
<Geese> The instructions were misleading
<blorpy> he shouldn't be kissing geese anyways
<blorpy> no matter how good their liver is
<Geese> I also think inserting prong A into slot B was a mistake
<LE2007dGOLEM|83> I think having 'prong's at all was a pretty bad idea...
<blorpy> prang prbng
#85 ⇧ (+75/-12) ⇩
(Geese) I suggest you check your timezone.
(Geese) It may be faulty.
(Ephphatha) no, I suggest you check your timezone
(Geese) It's GMT
(Geese) You don't want to mess with it
(Geese) Know why?
(Geese) 'cause it's MEAN time!
#84 ⇧ (+7/-3) ⇩
<marty_the_monist> LE4dGOLEM|YouNeedntQuoteMyFull: let yourself go, write 'm'
<LE4dGOLEM|YouNeedntQuoteMyFull> nah, I'm not CRAZY like you marty
<LE4dGOLEM|YouNeedntQuoteMyFull> you should call your self Marty_the_CRAZY_monist
* marty_the_monist is now known as marty_the_CRAZY_monist
#82 ⇧ (+246/-30) ⇩
< LE4dGOLEM|83> 'In some cultures, semen is attributed with special properties of masculinity. For instance, among the Etoro people of Papua New Guinea, it is believed that young boys must fellate their elders and ingest their sperm to achieve proper sexual maturation.' O_O
< khmer> LE4dGOLEM|83: i learned that in anthropology class
< khmer> and secured my 4.0 in the process
< root> 'anthropology class'
< root> '4.0'
< khmer> i'm not so much coining specious euphemisms as i am suggesting that i blew my professor
* morner takes a step back from that comment
* morner admires it from various angles
#80 ⇧ (+24/-7) ⇩
< blorpy> SpaceHobo: do christians have the same concept as jews and muslims with regard to the night being the first part of the day?
< SpaceHobo> blorpy: Eastern Christians do, but the former Roman Catholic folks use midnight
<%relsqui> that's an interesting thought--one could only really do that as long ago as there was timekeeping precise enough to reckon it.
< SpaceHobo> monasteries tended to use hourglasses which they would monitor, and ring bells
< SpaceHobo> that's why clocks have bells to chime the hours
< blorpy> and mentally ill disfigured men with spinal problems
< blorpy> who run those bells
-!- Glench [xinex@hide-A1D8BF8C.hsd1.ma.comcast.net] has joined #xkcd
< blorpy> speaking of mentally ill disfigured men with spinal problems
< blorpy> hi Glench
#79 ⇧ (+21/-5) ⇩
< Glench> WHY AM I SO SICK???
< JaggerG> because you eat germ covered pudding.
< Glench> no I don't
-!- blorpy [emad@hide-A408FDE7.dsl.rcsntx.swbell.net] has joined #xkcd
< marty_the_monist> You can eat my germ covered pudding, baby.
< blorpy> ok
< blorpy> can you fedex it to me?
#76 ⇧ (+50/-15) ⇩
< khmer> root: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Semen
< khmer> HALFWAY DOWN THE PAGE ON THE RIGHT
< khmer> AN ENTHUSIASTIC AND PRODUCTIVE *GNU*NIVERSE CITIZEN HAS HAPPILY CONTRIBUTED TO THE EFFORT TO FILL WIKIPEDIA WITH ONLY CREATIVE COMMONS PICTURES
< khmer> 'THE CLEAR AREAS HAVE BEGUN LIQUEFACTION'
< khmer> 'I JIZZED ON MY COUCH BECAUSE INFORMATION WANTS TO BE FREE'
#75 ⇧ (+34/-8) ⇩
< morner> i was wikipedia'ing how to make crack the other day
< root> mmm...wiki
< morner> you need coca leaves and baking soda
< morner> damned if i know where to find baking soda these days
#73 ⇧ (+10/-1) ⇩
< Andross> I built a dick keyboard once
< Andross> cybering with it was far too exhausting
< ther3> and a bit sticky
< Andross> naw
< Andross> I had a reservoir tip for that
< Andross> it was a thrust based controller
< Andross> worked sort of like a rotary phone
< Andross> go in to the proper letter, and then pull back to input it
< Andross> you could go all the way in to backspace
< Andross> I could do about 50wpm, but then the tip burst...
<%relsqui> so it was a bit like playing a trom-bone 8)
< Andross> heh
< Andross> I wonder if I could build a Kegel-based controller for ladies
#71 ⇧ (+5/-5) ⇩
<marty_the_monist> Linux is for fags.
<f8> which is why your here, right sweety?
<f8> always right?
<shoofle> marty_the_monist: disagreement!
<marty_the_monist> Where, shoofle?
<LE4dGOLEM|83> marty_the_monist: Linux is for geeks, buttseks is for fags
<shoofle> I think that linux is not just for bundles of sticks, or for cigarettes.
<shoofle> LE4dGOLEM|83: no disagreement!
#67 ⇧ (+20/-5) ⇩
< khmer> is this an argument about computer monitors
< shoofzilla> also, CRTs are generally too big to fit on my desk unprecariously
< shoofzilla> yes
< khmer> because i hate lcds AND crts
< khmer> i only use ASR-33 teletypes
< khmer> sometimes when i'm watching porn through aalib they jam
< khmer> but usually the refresh rate is pretty good
#66 ⇧ (+6/-2) ⇩
<%relsqui> that ended well.
-!- khmer [khmer@hide-8E0481AE.sea2.cablespeed.com] has joined #xkcd
< ther3> endings are good
< khmer> who wants to give me a neck massage
< ther3> happy ending?
#64 ⇧ (+19/-6) ⇩
<%skat_> oniichan and his girlfriend are having loud sex in the next room
<%skat_> I wouldn't care if they were having loud sex in his room, as it's in the opposite corner of the house =_= but they're in the laundry room
#59 ⇧ (+19/-5) ⇩
<%skat_> I just heard a car pull up
<%skat_> nobody is supposed to be here =_=;
<%skat_> I wish I had a lock on m ydoor
<%skat_> eee I'm scared
< root> skat_: Just shoot the bastards when they come in.
<%skat_> I don't have my gun
<%skat_> it's in oniichan's room because he is going to clean it for me
<%relsqui> I bet that wasn't the answer you were expecting. ; )
< root> That really wasn't 8)
<%skat_> I got my taser tho
< wisnij> use your leet kung-fu skills... you're asian, right? ;)
<%skat_> lol shut up
< root> Blind them with science!
< wisnij> that only works on Thomas Dolby
#57 ⇧ (+22/-7) ⇩
< Geese> I still maintain that george lucas deserves accolades for somehow making natalie portman unattractive
< afed> she'd look pretty in a burlap sack
< Geese> exactly
< Geese> and yet he STILL managed it
< Geese> then again he did also manage to ruin an unruinable sequel so I suppose he's just a genius
#56 ⇧ (+78/-14) ⇩
<%skat_> I made gingersnaps last week
<%skat_> they were fantastic
< Geese> My mum made those once
< Geese> I was actually bleeding from inside my mouth
<%skat_> I think she made them wrong
#55 ⇧ (+31/-7) ⇩
< khmer> i am so goddamn old
< khmer> i don't even have carpal tunnel syndrome
< khmer> i have carpal aqueduct syndrome
<%relsqui> I thought you meant like 'BACK IN MY DAY WE HAD ARTHRITIS'
#54 ⇧ (+16/-5) ⇩
< khmer> i'm a horrible man
< khmer> with bad taste and worse habits
< khmer> and you can't get enough of me
< khmer> all of you
< text_file> I thought so, but I'm starting to break out with a rash
< text_file> and my stool has become gradually more orange and watery
< text_file> I think I've had enough.
#52 ⇧ (+72/-13) ⇩
* khmer % echo dong > text_file
< text_file> tcsh: echo: dong too large
< khmer> gzip -up
< khmer> tar -xvvfeather
< text_file> there'd be nothing worse than living as a self-aware command line with a creepy user who thinks he's clever.
< khmer> that's why they kicked me out of AI
< khmer> i kept making the prototype consciousness fdisk itself out of horror
< khmer> 10 PRINT 'THIS IS THE SONG THAT NEVER ENDS'
#51 ⇧ (+459/-43) ⇩
-!- HotstuFF [3a47071a@hide-27D153A5.techwareit.com] has joined #xkcd
< HotstuFF> asl people
< HotstuFF> what's this channel about?
< relsqui> http://www.xkcd.com
< HotstuFF> how come there are too many people no one's chatting
* relsqui waves her hand in front of hotstuff's face.
< relsqui> This is not the channel you are looking for.
< HotstuFF> sorry then.
-!- HotstuFF [3a47071a@hide-27D153A5.techwareit.com] has left #xkcd 
#50 ⇧ (+6/-1) ⇩
<%relsqui> skilaatara: you're not a gay british mathematician? now you've brought my world crashing down around my ears.
<%relsqui> ^ funny story... apparently someone elsewhere in IRC decided I was gay, British, and male
<%relsqui> based on the way I talk
< elgreco> you arent?
< elgreco> then who was that guy with the funny facial hair?
* relsqui points at root
<%relsqui> who is neither gay nor British
<%relsqui> (or, if he is, he's really very closeted)
< elgreco> i hate closet brits
<%relsqui> I know, seriously
< elgreco> dirty redcoats
<%relsqui> we all know
<%relsqui> and everyone would be happier if he just started using the accent
< elgreco> i know i would
< elgreco> giddy school girl
< elgreco> that'd be me
#49 ⇧ (+12/-1) ⇩
<%skat_> I played a bunch of boys in pro face off mode today
<%skat_> I was playing on medium mostly so it would sound good so they always thought they would be cool and own the newbie ^^;
<%skat_> I 5-star free bird on expert today
<%skat_> in face off mode lol
<%skat_> the boy I was playing with actually said wtf like 'doubleyou tee eff' lol
#48 ⇧ (+91/-15) ⇩
< myren> dont you have like, work or something tomorrow xkcd?
<~xkcd> myren: the internet is my work
<%relsqui> wow, nice job.
<~xkcd> relsqui: if I type under 55 WPM, the internet goes down
<~xkcd> I'm alt-tabbing and posting on forums everywhere at a frantic pace
#47 ⇧ (+12/-1) ⇩
< blorpy> relsqui: GO TO SLEEP! MF-ER GO TO SLEEP!
< blorpy> xkcd: how's that?
< blorpy> i'm learning!
<~xkcd> blorpy: I still say you should ask for your money back
<~xkcd> that is the worst etiquette course i've ever seen
#46 ⇧ (+10/-1) ⇩
<blorpy> 'federal kickbacks trickle down, so why you homies frown?; you out there earning your wage, just be happy you ain't destitute, you lazy prostitute'
<khmer> 'You've got your freedom if you say you do / There's a mathematical chance you'll be rich as us too / MC Cuff Lnx only eats albino quail / I drink terrorist blood from the Holy Grail'
<blorpy> 'waiting for the 3rd quarter earnings, gonna buy myself all sorts of things, earrings, rings watches, oh yeah. i need a mega-yacht. but this, shiiiiiiiiz, it's going to also turn into a robot. you had transformers in the 80s, now you're nothing but reformers with no ladies'
<blorpy> my cut of the pie, it's 55 percent, for the rest of you fools, minimum wage just went up 33 cent
<khmer> 'Socialist pussies be trying to front shit / Don't shoot the messenger cause he be blunt shit / But hippy freak scrubs never changed a thing / Been 40 years now and all you punks just want bling'
<blorpy> now you talking about this insulting estate tax; why don't you haters just face the facts; you're kids' health is no concern to me; he's about to die? i certainly won't pay the doctors fee
<khmer> Straight talking muthafucka with a clearance / I rent the Pentagon to make a social appearance / But don't try to crash with your punk-ass crew / I heard you once got an email from the ACLU
<blorpy> i'm put in charge of the country/ with all my advisors spread amongst me. and all these proles so hungry/ they bite like they've got rabies
<khmer> Baby I got the keys to the fly honeys' box / I keep all my papers with me from Goldman Sachs / Yeah I got more cash money than the Ivory Coast / You think that ain't right then you're freedom toast'
<blorpy> here i am in my private plane; take the bus, punk, i don't feel your pain; diamonds is how my coat is lined, you freezing to death? i don't really mind
<khmer> You got some crazy religion? Don't make me hurtchaz / You ain't really righteous till you got ME-GA-CHURCHES
<blorpy> my grandfather worked hard so i could be successful; now you're complaining to me cause you grew up in a cesspool
<blorpy> you tired? move out of the slums; tonight your momma can make more money if she just used her gums
<khmer> I didn't wanna say it but you're still hanging around / Don't play me like that like I hate you cause you're brown / Yeah you trash muthafucka I hate you it's true / But it ain't cause you're brown, it's what the brown makes you do
#43 ⇧ (+53/-13) ⇩
* xkcd should probably stop answering fan mail drunk.
<%relsqui> oh you so shouldn't
<~xkcd> 'HI I LIKE YOU TOO BUT I THINK US BEING NKAED TOGETHER WOULD BE IMPRATICAL AND PROBABLY LEAD TO UNFORTUNATE SITUATIONS'
< Brian> xkcd: don't you mean you should stop answering fan mail sober?
<%relsqui> in fact I might have to send fan mail now 8) just to get in on this
< Brian> I'd actually PREFER my fan mail to be answered while you were drunk and preferably high on something
< Brian> How long could he maintain, I wondered. How long before he started raving and jabbering at me?
< Brian> (tonight, wherein #xkcd becomes Bat country)
#42 ⇧ (+26/-5) ⇩
< Hermiene> *sigh*
< Hermiene> I hate infinite loops, especially when I don't know where they are.
< exnor> Hermiene: easy, replace every while(x) loop with while (x and i < 100000)
< exnor> and never decrement i
< exnor> and replace every for loop with the corresponding while loop
<%relsqui> or just fix the condition that's making it infinite
< exnor> nah, that's a cheap hack that'd never work
#41 ⇧ (+26/-6) ⇩
< Lhyzzbian> Wow, qdb has a giant bug in it.
< Lhyzzbian> gaping stat altering horrible bug.
< Lhyzzbian> I should submit a 'DAVEAN IS WRONG' quote
< Lhyzzbian> and then write a script to vote it up.
<%relsqui> wouldn't work.
<%relsqui> admin has to approve before the quote is available for voting.
< Lhyzzbian> You're so going to approve it.
#40 ⇧ (+30/-6) ⇩
<MathBluster> Also, our top words are not very interesting.
<MathBluster> We must pick an interesting word and say it unto death.
<candace> like what?
<relsqui> that's a pretty interesting word.
<paxsboy> That's hard to beat.
<MathBluster> All in favor of octothorpe?
<paxsboy> I third it and move that we accept it.
<candace> octothorpe it is
<candace> octothorpe is a great word!
<Ephphatha> octothorpe ftw
<paxsboy> Nobody doesn't like octothorpe!
#39 ⇧ (+30/-7) ⇩
<root> I remember when we didn't have the web. Instead we had gopher.
<SickHippie> you had gopher?
<root> You didn't have any of those damned images. They took too long to load as it was.
<elgreco> instead of tubes, it was tunnels
<SickHippie> we would have DREAMED of having hopher
<SickHippie> all these damn new-fangled letters
<SickHippie> we had BBS
<SickHippie> LONG DISTANCE
<SickHippie> back when you had to pay per minute for long distance
<root> Yeah? Well we used to transmit via kermit at 300 baud
<SickHippie> we had two tin cans and a 200 mile long string
<root> before that it was 120 baud. On an acoustic modem
<SickHippie> used to tap the cans in binary
<root> and if you spoke too loud in the room, it dropped the connection.
<root> Shoot, we used to do it with smoke signals.
<SickHippie> you had fire?
<root> We tried semaphore, but we just didn't have the terrain.
* SickHippie hobbles off to take some multi-vitamins
<root> Before that, we used to stand in a line and shout messages at each other
<agilman> yeah, things are getting too complicated, ajax ,web2
<SickHippie> you had a line?
<root> and when you couldn't hear someone over the shout, you'd go run over to the next person over to ask them what they said
<root> and if'n you did that with too many people at a time, you'd stop paying attention and run into the person
<root> and that's why to this day, they call two packets on the same line a collision.
* SickHippie applauds root's incredible buildup for such a lame joke
#38 ⇧ (+325/-35) ⇩
<SickHippie> hey... how does this channel feel about the '/me is listening to:' things?
<relsqui> personally, I find them harmless in moderation
<relsqui> but they can quickly become very annoying
<SickHippie> probably best to avoid it then
<SickHippie> they work better in smaller channels
<SickHippie> otherwise you get radio wars
<Ephphatha> I've got my client set up to filter them out anyway
<Ephphatha> so spam away, I won't see it
<Ephphatha> or any message starting with 'is listening to:'
<vector40> is listening to: Ephphatha is a bum
<vector40> is listening to: let's roll him for his shoes
<Ephphatha> god damn mirc
* relsqui grins at vector
<vector40> is listening to: I can't respect anyone whose name is unpronounceable
<Ephphatha> I told it to filter 'is listening to:' and it didn't go through
<vector40> ... crap.
<Ephphatha> vector40: You're a bum
<vector40> just trying to help out!
<Ephphatha> ok, newly added
<Ephphatha> *is listening to* and *is DDR'ing to*
<vector40> is listening to: hope he can't hear me anymore
<vector40> is listening to: because we got some shit to plan
<Ephphatha> ...you lot have all been badmouthing me haven't you
<vector40> I am HURT.
<Ephphatha> I think I need to temporarly disable those filters...
<vector40> is listening to: he knows!
* SickHippie stifles a giggle
<vector40> is listening to: hide the devices!