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125 of 128

#247 (+21/-6)
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< fortitUs> and the scientists are forced to conclude
< fortitUs> tibetan monks are the first to ever discover resistance
< fortitUs> by their loud chants of Ohmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
< fortitUs> Ohmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
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<%Ephphatha> ...
< morner> ...

#246 (+1/-7)
< Dextrose> man, god sucks
< Overand> Dextrose has quit (Connection reset by Yaweh)

#245 (+101/-17)
<%relsqui> Gelsamel: no, I put it in, you just didn't notice
<%relsqui> .... WOW that needed context.

#244 (+5/-1)
<relsqui> infralite: escape the colon, I think

#243 (+11/-0)
<shoofle> boobs?
<Glench> boobs!
<Glench> or as you may know them 80085

#242 (+4/-2)
<shoofle> calculus: I WISH TO BE INSIDE YOU

#241 (+20/-5)
< SargeZT> Bucket, what is love?
< Bucket> sargezt: wish i knew
< SargeZT> :(
<%khmer> Bucket, love is <reply> Baby don't hurt me.
< Bucket> OK, khmer.
<%khmer> Bucket, what is love?
< Bucket> Baby don't hurt me.
<%relsqui> Bucket: love is <reply>Baby ... DAMMIT KHMER
< Bucket> ...but love is <reply> Baby don't hurt me....

#240 (+43/-9)
<%mewyn-zombie> Who here has some extra brains I can, erm, borrow.

#238 (+11/-0)
<%Hermiene> http://isomerica.net/~stats/xkcd.html <- Holy shit, does 'nick++' actually affect the karma ratings?
< Maladroit> that's usually the way it works, yes.
< Glench> Hermiene--
< Maladroit> Hermiene--
<%Hermiene> :'-(

#237 (+17/-6)
<%mewyn> You hear some noises in the distance.
<%mewyn> You see a zombie elf standing befor you.
<%mewyn> #chat
<%mewyn> The zombie elf asks you why he stayed up so late playing WoW.
* infralite moves north
* infralite picks up torch
* infralite looks south
<%mewyn> The zombie elf just kind of stands there with a sleepy look on his face.
* infralite picks up zombie
<%mewyn> Your actions are now encumbered.
* infralite puts zombie down
* infralite searches zombie
<%mewyn> You find 3 lembas wafers and a set of discs for WoW.
* infralite loots zombie
* infralite calls the zombie a hypocrite
< infralite> oh wait, why *he* stayed
<%mewyn> The zombie falls over and falls asleep.
* infralite retracts
* infralite leaves the zombie to be and wanders north
<%mewyn> You get zapped by a grid bug.
<%mewyn> You die.
< infralite> fucking rpgs
<%mewyn> Would you like your possesions identified?
< infralite> all the same ..
< infralite> [Y]
<%mewyn> 3 uncursed lembas wafers
<%mewyn> 1 cursed set of WoW discs.
< infralite> woot.

#236 (+20/-5)
<%shoofle> ugh internet explorerz got on me
<Glench> shoofle, you don't deserve our sympathy rays anymore
<%shoofle> WHAT
<%shoofle> I'm only opening up IE to download firefox!
<%shoofle> I'm only getting aids to get the free condoms they give you

#235 (+2/-8)
Mihai: the xkcd chat isnt as funny as i though it would be
kakos: vr: You here?
Mihai: nope
Mihai: i ate him
morner: then no wonder it isn't funny
Mihai: pretty much
morner: vr was the funniest person here
Mihai: i also ate hist cat
Mihai: was his cat funny?
morner: his cat was the second funniest :/
Mihai: damit

#234 (+18/-6)
< morner> my finger has started to hurt
< Sweeper> morner: I suggest you remove it from your anus
< morner> Sweeper: that's what she said
< morner> no, wait
< morner> ...shit.
< Sweeper> quite

#233 (+41/-10)
< Geese> I suggest you stop sticking them up german musicians
< Mike> Ewww

#232 (+1/-2)
< Stereo> why would you write it as a recursion if you can use a loop?
* relsqui snickers
<%root> Stereo: You know, I've been asking LISP people that very thing for years now...
< Stereo> i don't talk to people who lisp
<%root> Stereo: You prefer the ones who scheme?
<%relsqui> that'th not very nithe. they can't help it.
< Stereo> i'm sure they could stop if they wanted to
<%root> What about the ones who are full OCaml shit?
<%root> They're really the meek of this world. They shall inherit as the lambdas which lay down with the lions.

#231 (+1/-5)
< Glench> in soviet russia, cold war loses YOU

#229 (+203/-25)
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< Glench> uh oh

#228 (+7/-1)
<Cctoide> Q: Why can't you carpet bomb the Middle East?
<Cctoide> A: Because they've already got more carpets than they can use.
<shadebug> ergo, dropping more will cause saturation and eventually explosion
<shadebug> that's why they call it carpet bombing

#227 (+1/-5)
* shadebug starts x
<shadebug> ahh, gloriously stretched pixels
<Cctoide> That still won't make that .jpg's boobs bigger, you know.
<shadebug> Cctoide: but it will make them jigglier in the .avi
<shadebug> sorry, boobs come on .wmv
<shadebug> sorry, boobs come on .mov if they're expensive
* Ohki likes .mpg boobs, fun for everyone

#226 (+22/-7)
<relsqui> holy crap, my clean clothes were in the dryer that whole time
<relsqui> I would never have thought of that!
* relsqui does laundry.
<rut> Is that like Debbie Does Dallas?
<shadebug> yeah, but with more clothes

#225 (+39/-8)
<%Ephphatha> shadebug: I have chips, does that count?
< shadebug> depends what you mean by chips
<%Ephphatha> crisps
< shadebug> what flavour crisps?
<%Ephphatha> They're 'Tastes like fucking potato you ponce' crisps
<%Ephphatha> I hate flavoured crisps

#224 (+1/-1)
< agilman_2> god damn, I can't change my nick to agilman
<%mewyn> You may want to use nickserv to ghost your other connection.
< shadebug> explain how
< agilman_2> I don't think I've ever registered my nick on this server
<%mewyn> Well, then wait for the timeout
< agilman_2> its been about 12 hours and agilman still hasn't timed out
<%mewyn> Is the client still running?
< agilman_2> nope
< shadebug> tried PMing him?
< root> Better run out and catch it (ha ha ha)
< agilman_2> wait a second
<%relsqui> (haha)
< agilman_2> I think my client is logged in as agilman, agilman_ and agilman_1
< agilman_2> and agilman_2
<%relsqui> ...
<%mewyn> lol
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< root> bwahahahaha
< infralite> heh
< root> ...huh
< root> agilman_2 [root@hide-6087309E.hcoop.net]

#221 (+5/-2)
<xkcd> http://blog.plover.com/math/sqrt-2-new.html <-- elegant!
<shadebug> I'm more impressed that american mathematical monthly had over 800 pages in its vovember 2000 issue
<Cctoide> I'm more impressed that American Mathematical Monthly had a vovember 2000 issue.
<Cctoide> Maybe this is related to that news about the discovery of fourteen previously unknown days in November.

#220 (+23/-5)
<Cctoide> New Blender Released
<Cctoide> The question is...
<Cctoide> 'Will It Render?'

#219 (+0/-1)
LE4dGOLEM|83: I re-arranges text formatting into high-res ascci art nippls

#218 (+2/-0)
*** Togo has signed off IRC (Quit: Good Night).
root: ...night?
root: NIGHT?!?!?!?
*** Togo has joined #xkcd.
fortitUs: technically its morning here...
infralite: psst. root is nuts.
*** Togo has signed off IRC (Quit: My bad, Good Morning then).

#217 (+335/-35)
<Geese> I think short hair's pretty awesome too
<Geese> and
<Geese> it has the advantage of being less likely to get stuck in heavy machinery
<Geese> which, you know, is something I look for in a woman

#216 (+17/-6)
<Geese> I have a frame from that bit in Lost in Translation where her ass fills THE ENTIRE SCREEN
<Geese> I'm planning on getting it enlarged onto an A2 print
<%Ephphatha> Do it
<%Ephphatha> take a photo with you in front for scale
<%Ephphatha> wear pants.

#215 (+5/-1)
< kakos> root is an e-troll. He eats system processes and flamers.
< kakos> Don't you know the ecosystem of the internet, J?
< kakos> Well, I'm off to write my next campaign session.
< kakos> Later, yos
* root eats kakos's word processor
< kakos> Shit. My word processor crashed for no reason and I lost a lot of work on my story.
<%root> Hahahaha!
< kakos> :( Why must you mock me?
< Invariel> Because you fail to save.
<%root> One moment and you'll laugh too. 8)
root then links to xkcdb...

#213 (+0/-2)
no-genius: how can i have more /fiction if i haven't had any to begin with ?

#211 (+2/-1)
<%relsqui> take your time, I'm going to hop to the bathroom.
< shadebug> freaky, I was just taking a dump
<%relsqui> >_> <_< there are no coincidences

#210 (+4/-1)
<mewyn> Gah.
<mewyn> Want to go back to bed.
<LE4dGOLEM|83> mewyn: As a person who may or may not be a doctor, i prescribe sleep
<xkcd> Speaking of doctors, least reassuring statistic ever: '95% of headaches are not life-threatening.'
<LE4dGOLEM|83> O_O
<Invariel> Umm...
<Invariel> Shit.
<Hermiene> Wait. That means that 5% ARE!
<xkcd> (from wikipedia)
<Hermiene> o.O
<Invariel> I think I've had 95 headaches in my life thus far...
<Hermiene> Then you're slated for death the next time.
<LE4dGOLEM|83> so, if you have a headache roll a d20. if it comes up '1', you're screwed
<Hermiene> I mean, obviously. I've taken Probability Theory 101, you know. I've got, like, a Ph. D. in Prollybilaty Theory.
<LE4dGOLEM|83> you chould have minored in english
<LE4dGOLEM|83> should*
<LE4dGOLEM|83> chould is a combination of could and should. SHUT UP!
<Hermiene> XD
<SpaceHobo> I prefer chwould
<SpaceHobo> which is coulda-shoulda-woulda
<SpaceHobo> Dear English,
<SpaceHobo> Stop being so fucking saxon.
<Hermiene> You know, I was wracking my brain for a scathing comeback, but I just couldn't because I was distracted trying to guess how you'd eventually respond to that. :-P
<Hermiene> So the 'SHUP UP' comment was actually apt.
<SpaceHobo> shuppety shup shup shuputtle
<fortitUs> :O
<shadebug> wow, High School Musical is just apalling. i mean, i love crappy films, but that was just another level
<shadebug> saxn rawks
<shadebug> saxon
* SpaceHobo shivs shadebug
<shadebug> actually, saxon's not so great
<shadebug> what you want is that dutch language

#209 (+4/-3)
Ephphatha: Jesus bowls with me every saturday night
Ephphatha: I mean, The Jesus
nullword: dude's a pederast
relsqui: Hermiene: ... yes, but you already were.
root: Hermiene's a pederast?
nullword: yes. he sure is
nullword: i mean, why not?
Hermiene: Yeah, why not?
Hermiene: I can't stay away from those cute little buns and the soft skin with the tiny nipples...
nullword: is that so wrong?
Hermiene: Oh man, now I gotta go masturbate again. Thank you VERY MUCH.
* Hermiene updates his subscription to NAMBLA, then goes to masturbate.

#206 (+494/-45)
< fortitUs> hm.. whats a strapon? :S *innocent look*
<%relsqui> fortitUs: it's what I would use, lacking a cock, if I wanted to screw someone with one
< fortitUs> O_O
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<%relsqui> oh man, I remembered that he's like 12 RIGHT after I said that

#205 (+4/-0)
shoofle: man, $brother and I are the worst SWAT team ever
Geese: Oh man
shoofle: we've been playing swat 4, with his friend, and we really are
Geese: Now I'm brain damaged
Cctoide: throwing pastries at the enemy?
shoofle: Cctoide: not so much as throwing bullets at each other's faces
shoofle: and we downloaded a mod to make the game easier
* Geese finds religion
Cctoide: when you start throwing bullets at each other's faeces, that's when the fun begins
shoofle: and I believe that getting the machine guns that shoot through walls may have been a bad choice, vis-a-vis safety
Cctoide: or maybe it's when somebody loses an eye
Cctoide: I can't recall
shoofle: there is no fun but laydser guns, and mohammed is his prophet
Cctoide: I hope you get to use flyswatters.
*** xkcd has changed the topic on channel #xkcd to <shoofle> and I believe that getting the machine guns that shoot through walls may have been a bad choice, vis-a-vis safety.
* Invariel chuckles.
Cctoide: It was a good choice, fun-wise.
Cctoide: I shall take this opportunity to protest against xkcd's lack of miniguns.
shoofle: xkcd: now with more miniguns!
relsqui: shoofle: yeah, I know, but I'm a longtime fan
shoofle: hmmm... miiguns...
relsqui: it's been my start page forever
shoofle: relsqui: eh, your choice.
* Invariel needs miiguns for his Mii.
Cctoide: I need missiles for my MiG.
relsqui: I need missiles for me
* Invariel wonders who (or what) relsqui would aim them at.
Invariel: Remember, I've been a decent person in the three weeks you've known me.
* relsqui giggles.
relsqui: three weeks? but it feels like a lifetime.
Invariel: Aww.
Cctoide: relsqui needs missiles for her basement-built A-bomb
relsqui: I live in a third-story walkup : \
Cctoide: That's why you're building it on your bed.
* relsqui looks
relsqui: root is an a-bomb apparently
Cctoide: Well, I wasn't going to tell you

#203 (+8/-2)
* no-genius wakes #xkcd
SpaceHobo: it's not so late as that
Lhyzz: It's 1:39 PM
SpaceHobo: maybe in the crazy nation of Rand McNally
SpaceHobo: with its rococco borders and fleurs-de-lis rivers
SpaceHobo: but here in Nürnberg it's 19:41
SpaceHobo: and don't you forget it
no-genius: 18.41
SpaceHobo: maybe in Angle-Land
no-genius: maybe so
SpaceHobo: I actually only just fixed this laptop's timezone from London to Berlin
SpaceHobo: 18:41 <no-genius> 18.41
SpaceHobo: 19:42 <%SpaceHobo> maybe in Angle-Land
SpaceHobo: so I'm in no position to argue the True Time
nookly: pssh! it's @823.65, silly!
nookly: try and dispute that
SpaceHobo: you kids and your swatch internut thyme
nookly: oh man tuna salad
nookly: the internets are always right
Lhyzz: Nürnberg?
SpaceHobo: Yes.
SpaceHobo: Nürnberg
Lhyzz_: how is that pronounced? Nyaquarternberg?

#201 (+9/-0)
< Stereo> as was pointed out to me recently
< Stereo> 'minutely' is the correct word for 'something happening at a frequency of once per minute'
<%root> But it's such a small and unimportant word, Stereo.

#200 (+15/-5)

#197 (+121/-18)
*** fortitUs has left #xkcd.
no-genius: so how is everyone?
*** Hermiene has signed off IRC (Quit: ).
no-genius: :(
no-genius: :'(
* no-genius has chocolate
*** Hermiene has joined #xkcd.
*** Averell has joined #xkcd.

#196 (+8/-0)
mewyn: http://www.networkworld.com/news/2007/020807-rsa-cyber-attacks.html Gives a new light on Google Bombing.
Cctoide: cyber attacks?
* Cctoide puts on his robe and wizard hat
* Cctoide brings out his bazooka
* melvar camps
* Cctoide telefrags melvar
* melvar wasnt camping there, fool
*** fortitUs has joined #xkcd.
fortitUs: :(
* melvar waves
*** YMelvar is now known as no-genius.
* fortitUs waves back
* no-genius attacks Cctoide with the Katanah
fortitUs: :O
* fortitUs bombs both of them up
* Cctoide wallhacks
no-genius: ?
* Hermiene God modes.
* no-genius wasn't camping there either
* fortitUs sets sv_cheats 0
* no-genius sets it to nightmare mode
* fortitUs goes into FSM mode
fortitUs: :O
no-genius: :?
* fortitUs FlyingSpaghettiMonster
*** fortitUs is now known as FlyingSpaghettiMonster.
FlyingSpaghettiMonster: :O
* no-genius attacks fortitUs with noodley appendage
FlyingSpaghettiMonster: but those are mine -.-

#195 (+3/-0)
FlyingSpaghettiMonster: the FlyingSpaghettiMonster is the only constant
FlyingSpaghettiMonster: everything else is faulse
FlyingSpaghettiMonster: false*
* melvar wonders about pi
FlyingSpaghettiMonster: :)
Hermiene: Spice is the source of Life.
FlyingSpaghettiMonster: pi .. is
FlyingSpaghettiMonster: -.-
FlyingSpaghettiMonster: 42 is
melvar: good
Hermiene: spice > 42
FlyingSpaghettiMonster: i have 42 noodly appendages
FlyingSpaghettiMonster: :O
Stereo: 6.02 x 10^28?
melvar: when come back, bring pi
Hermiene: I want to suck on your spicy 42 noodly appendages.
FlyingSpaghettiMonster: -_-
* Cctoide ramens Hermiene
FlyingSpaghettiMonster: Spiciness is an illusion
Hermiene: Oh man, that'd make a great hentai film.

#193 (+38/-9)
<%shoofle> Andross: psychic isn't an element, it's a TYPE
<%shoofle> AIR is an element
<%shoofle> FIRE is an element
<%shoofle> WATER is an element
<%shoofle> PLANT, a type or subelement is composed of EARTH and WATER
<%root> What about HEART?
<%shoofle> root: no one cares about your heart
<%shoofle> it's too black
<%shoofle> and no one cares about black things
-!- shoofle is now known as shoofle_is_racist
<%shoofle_is_racist> they're all part of the jewish lizard banking gay french conspiracy to put down us white people

#192 (+16/-4)
fortitUs: 0xDEADDEAD : A Microsoft Windows STOP Error code used when the user manually initiates the crash. wtf o_O
no-genius: user manually initiates the crash = installing windows i guess

#191 (+17/-5)
<khmer> I took a Turing test and came out HIV positive.

#189 (+0/-2)
The hazards of /nick:

-!- KKK is now known as Hermiene
-!- root changed the topic of #xkcd to: KKK is now known as Hermiene

#187 (+1/-0)
<Hermiene> Here's the best summary of the human race: 'Everyone was ready, the shot went, a lot of people ran (most didn't hear the gun go off), and there was a lot of chaos. Some people were confused, others were run over and killed.'

#186 (+10/-0)
<LE4dGOLEM|83> question: does anyone here know why Italy and Ethiopia fought between WWI and WWII?
<fortitUs> Ethiopia had raptors
<fortitUs> Italy had to eliminate em

#185 (+27/-7)
< JLutovsky> deathcamp for cutie would be a completely different band, wouldnt it?

#183 (+27/-7)
-> J0ck3r has joined xkcd
J0ck3r: whats this server
fortitUs: 1337 hax
J0ck3r: ircatwork
J0ck3r: ?
fortitUs : :0
J0ck3r: how do i talk like hackker
J0ck3r: like those code
fortitUs: uh
fortitUs: try..
fortitUs: 'Hey babe, I ma gonna hack you'
J0ck3r: no man
relsqui: oh yeah, that always goes down well with the ladies
J0ck3r: like 4ax0r
J0ck3r: something like that
fortitUs: 0xDEADC0DE
fortitUs: uh
-> shadebug has joined xkcd
J0ck3r: mother fuk
J0ck3r: where to learn
Cctoide: roffle.
Cctoide: J0ck3r: try /join #0,0
Cctoide: they'll help you
relsqui: I hear that the more advanced community colleges teach it now
J0ck3r: v join ur mothers hairry pussy
shadebug: I hate walking in halfway through something funny
relsqui: haha
fortitUs: yea
fortitUs: J0ck3r
relsqui: uh, that guy is looking for a leetspeak mentor
fortitUs: to write in nice letters
relsqui: that's about all the background you need
fortitUs: simply use a convex hull
fortitUs: algorithm
shadebug: google translate does that
fortitUs: any one you want.. on the letters
fortitUs: graham scan would be nice
Cctoide: relsqui, hand him the transduced intercapacitor flux rotocator
fortitUs: lets take for example erm...
fortitUs: O
fortitUs: O is apoint so the convex hull is O itself
fortitUs: next, map the convex hull to something else
fortitUs: with equal hull.. in this case, 0
shadebug: we're talking about boats, right?
<- J0ck3r has disconnected (Quit: )

#182 (+23/-6)
< morner> apparently the mystery substance i slept in after the pub crawl, was mashed potato

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